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Not so “Dear” Tesco

imageDear Tesco
Now, I know you are being ripped a new arsehole by your competitors at the moment and probably don’t have time to listen to a mere customer. But, as one of the remaining foolhardy few, may I be so bold as to make a suggestion? Sort your sodding carrier bags out!!!

The current batch you are using aren’t fit to be called useless. What are they made from? Fairy wings? Baby hair? Unicorn eyelashes? All I know is that if I put in anything heavier than a cotton wool ball they disintegrate faster than Prince Andrew’s reputation. At this rate I’m going to need a human chain to get my shopping from the trolley into my car boot.

Yes, I know you provide reusable bags but I have about 84 in my kitchen drawer which I never remember to reuse and, to be quite honest, rocking up with a haul of garishly illustrated carriers makes me feel like my grandma.

Up until now I’ve resisted the allure of Lidl and Aldi despite glowing recommendations from just about everyone I know (partly because of their carrier bag situation but mainly because I am a massive snob), but you’re losing me Tesco, I’m ready to leave you in disgust after yet another futile attempt to get my goods from the car to the kitchen without leaving a trail of my shopping at the mercy of the neighbourhood cats.

This is your last warning…….

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