Child + Breakfast
Let me just start by saying Child completes me. I begin where he ends and I’m pretty sure we’ve been together in many previous lives. But Jesus he annoys me at breakfast time! He has very weird and particular tastes when it comes to brekkie which usually involve me putting more effort in than is necessary – or sane. His list of acceptable breakfasts include:
- Fruit salad with chocolate dip
- Salami, ham and crackers
- Egg white omelette (oh I kid you not)
- Bacon and sausage Sandwich
Toast? A bowl of cereal? Oh that my life were that simple….
This morning I went for the easy option, I threw some salami slices and ritz crackers on a plate only to be told “aw muuuuum, you’ve let the salami touch the crackers!”
I told him to either ring Childline or get a life. Harsh maybe but at the time I was trying to “spread” my toast with just-out-of-the-fridge Lurpak (I have very simple breakfast tastes), I may as well have ripped the toast into pieces and thrown a few globules of rock hard butter at it and saved 2 minutes of my life as that’s how it always ends up but I don’t really like soft butter, and I only like the crusts, and I don’t like it if the wrong side is buttered……….